Hong Kong awakened this year (Lee Yee)
2019 was an important and meaningful year for Hong Kong; it was also the most important year in my life.
2019 will go down in history. This year, Hong Kong awakened. The awakening was a milestone in a history of 200 years. It was somewhat sudden but not coincidental. It was the awakening of Hong Kong people and it would pass along generations. It would be a path of no return. There would be no looking back.
At the end of March this year, I announced in this column that I would stop writing news commentaries,but bring out a memoir of my life in the days to come.
My life experience are insignificant. Nevertheless, fortunately or unfortunately, I have been living in an era that China, Taiwan and Hong Kong have undergone significant changes. I have been in the highly sensitive media industry, which observes, reports and comments on changes in these three places. I have witnessed the sinking of Hong Kong media, which used to be able to observe and comment on current affairs and politics with much greater freedom than its counterparts in China and Taiwan. The credibility of Hong Kong media has been on the decline because of self-censorship and political correctness in the face of pressure from advertising and on editorials. I have seen how the advocacy of “Hong Kong today, Taiwan tomorrow” has become a statement of caution and suspicion for Taiwan people. In this era of change, my social role, my background, my work, my family and my struggles at crossroads in life are rather unique. I want to leave some enduring marks in my remaining years.
I said this would be my last wish at the age of 83.
But rather unexpectedly, from April onwards, I have been much impacted by the anti-extradition bill protest and no longer had the mood to reminisce about the past. I have been so concerned with everyday happenings that I cannot refrain from writing my feelings and comments on the current situation, and re-examining my ideas in view of the changes in the political scene. I have awakened in many aspects. I have let go of my last wish because I thought that my life experiences were no longer important even for myself.
Lu Xun said: Undoubtedly, I often scrutinize other people but more often, I engage in introspection ruthlessly.” I have also done a lot of soul searching throughout my life and have awakened at different levels, from awakening to socialism and the Communist Party to awakening to patriotism and China. Such awakenings run through my writings. At the age of 80, I had supposed that my ideas and my understanding of the Hong Kong society would not waver. However, the anti-extradition bill protest shook me up totally.
Some months ago, a young writer Lewis Loud asked me in an interview whether I felt running out of time. I guessed he was referring to my memoir. I told him, “Yes, but I will just go with the flow. I have wanted to write a memoir but now I think it’s OK if that cannot be accomplished”. Although we have to be rational in writing politics, men are emotional beings. Our lives, our decisions and our choices are dictated by emotions, not reasons. I find it hard to leave Hong Kong behind because of my emotions; I put aside my memoir also because of my emotions. Things happen right under our very eyes, we are propelled into actions by our emotions. We can resist many things in life but we cannot resist our emotions.
Life is full of uncertainties and so I will cherish every moment and seize the day. To worry that one’s days are numbered, or to think that many are the years to come is equally futile.
A young friend who read the interview suggested that I write my feelings of last year in the first chapter of my memoir and look back at my life from there.
What a good idea! If it is to written, it is going to be an important chapter, a chapter of final awakening. All the elements of this chapter, which were in the commentaries I wrote in 2019, are included in this book. (Preface:Hong Kong awakened – 2019, a milestone in history)
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