[tạm ngưng duyệt info các shop để chống dịch cho đến khi shipper giao bth 3 miền] 4.9.
[English below] [Vẫn vậy, all free, nhưng dì sẽ có thêm những hạn mục mới cho phù hợp thời cuộc và đối tượng hỗ trợ là newbie mới tập kinh doanh thương mại điện tử]
Năm qua là năm biến động nhưng trong chúng ta đã có ít nhiều bài học làm vốn vào đời :))) , dì đã chứng kiến nhiều buồn vui của các cháu gửi về. Có những nỗi buồn khó nói về chuyện thất nghiệp dài hạn, rã team start-up vì miss Rona… và cũng có những câu chuyện tìm thấy hướng phát triển mới trên thương mại điện tử, nhờ mọi người ở nhà và mua hàng nhiều hơn nhờ những chính sách bình thường mới, “work from home” “study at home”. Vui hơn nữa là dì chứng kiến những chủ doanh nghiệp trước đây nhất quyết chỉ bán hàng tại store nay lại tập tành bán trên sàn thương mại điện tử, dần dà 1 đơn, 10 đơn rồi hàng trăm đơn, riết ghiền, dẹp store mặt tiền vào hẻm lên lầu mở store bán phụ, chuyển qua bán online là chính luôn.
Vì vậy, trong năm 2021, dì sẽ dùng cộng đồng của mình để chia sẻ đến những thương gia, những chủ doanh nghiệp đăng tải thông tin miễn phí, giới thiệu câu chuyên thương hiệu và mặt hàng đang bán,
qua đó có thể dựa vào đó làm bệ phóng đầu sự nghiệp nhắm tiếp cận người tiêu dùng, đỡ phần nào nỗi lo chi phí chạy truyền thông, trong khi sản phẩm mình bán okla
quý doanh nghiệp nhỏ lẻ, những thương gia trẻ có thể tham gia bằng cách hoàn thành form ứng cử sau:
🥰 Dành cho seller xốpi mới biết đến vụ này
(hoặc mới biết dì) ko yêu cầu chi phí nào, chỉ cần điền form
mảng fashion https://forms.gle/S34cx2SYvD8zyWmy7
mảng Bách hóa/ mẹ bé https://forms.gle/LK9qSVzdBj1ivZh79
mảng SKINCARE/BODYCARE/MAKEUP/ BEAUTY/ HEALTHCARE https://forms.gle/RFPx3XNfd5CY3iZK8
mảng Điện tử/ gia dụng phụ kiện phone https://forms.gle/bS9jeNt95RypVzdg8
mảng văn phòng phẩm, nhà cửa đời sống thú cưng
https://forms.gle/y8w48AE7gHwv5nDZA
🥰Dành cho những shop đã lên sóng nhưng muốn tính chuyện lâu dài cùng dì: https://forms.gle/yru4y4zybTuCXxWo6
🥰Dành cho seller xốp pi đã từng được lên sóng và muốn tiếp tục thông báo chương trình sale nhanh, khỏi viết nhiều.
mảng bách hóa, nhà cửa đời sống, văn phòng phẩm https://forms.gle/e31edEjRYmXPutBe9
mảng fashion nam nữ https://forms.gle/8qpaDqghdWo4sCFKA
mảng skincare bodycare https://forms.gle/b6kc1B1yngei1yuR7
* tham khảo đợt rồi 4.4 mấy seller dì duyệt cũng cho cho exclusive sale chấn động nè https://www.facebook.com/badinulo/photos/2847393805575631
------- Dành cho các cháu- độc giả của dì -----------
Có thể yêu cầu review sản phẩm, các shop trên shopee, hoặc mở thảo luận, tại đây: https://forms.gle/HwDoboPpbcXvCnaC9
Review sách đã đọc đến với mọi người: https://forms.gle/cyAQgwHi3z4joJUJ6
>>>> Dành cho các start-up, doanh nghiệp, agency <<<
For startup, Enterprises, Agencies https://www.facebook.com/badinulo/posts/2296898197291864
Full post English below (July. 2019)
GIVE BACK + HOẠT ĐỘNG TƯƠNG LAI CỦA BÀ DÌ NULO
GIVE BACK and future operation of the page (very long post, but your time is highly appreciated)
P/s: Đây là một bài viết rất dài nhưng mong các cháu có thể bỏ ra chút thời gian để nghe lời tâm sự mỏng của dì nhé.
Vào ngày 30/5, dì có thông báo cắt quảng cáo. Quyết định đấy được kha khá các cháu ủng hộ nhưng cũng có vài cháu đặt câu hỏi tại sao dì lại đưa ra quyết định đấy, thì trong post này dì sẽ giải thích cho các cháu một phần lí do dẫn tới lựa chọn của dì.
Tuy dì không phụ thuộc quá nhiều nhưng dì không thể phủ nhận nguồn tiền quảng cáo thu được từ page Dì không phải là một nguồn thu nhỏ, và việc một fanpage khi có một số lượng theo dõi nhất định thì việc bán quảng cáo là một điều rất phổ biến. Hơn nữa, nhằm thu hút các doanh nghiệp quảng cáo tới với mình thì ta phải có những content có lượt tương tác cao để họ đổ đến mình nhiều hơn. Dẫn tới việc trong một thời gian dài dì chạy đua theo điều đấy.
Đến tầm tháng 9/2018, dì bỗng cảm thấy chán page của mình. Khi trong thời gian đó tất cả những gì dì làm là đăng vài post vui vui vô thưởng vô phạt, may mắn thì đột nhiên post đấy được nhiều tương tác cao, rồi bỗng một ai đó liên hệ quảng cáo xong chỉ chỉnh sửa một vài câu rồi đăng lên và nhận tiền. Dì tự hỏi bản thân, thế đây là những gì mình sẽ làm mãi mãi sao? Rồi 5 năm nữa, page này sẽ như thế nào? Sau khi câu hỏi 5 năm hiện lên trong đầu dì, dì mới giật mình nhận ra rằng mình hoàn toàn không biết sẽ làm gì tiếp với page trong 2 năm tới huống chi là 5 năm. Dì đã từng chứng kiến số phận của một số page lớn vụt lên nhanh trong thời gian ngắn và sau đó lụi tàn thành những page cứ tiếng là đăng link một bài báo. “Thế Nhung ơi, mày có muốn page của mày cũng thành như thế không?” Câu trả lời tất nhiên là không. Và thế là trong thời gian đó, dì chỉ có một lựa chọn duy nhất là khi nào mình thật sự chán chịu không nổi nữa thì mình sẽ dừng hoạt động hoàn toàn. Hoặc, dì nghĩ ra thêm một mảng mới gì đó để làm và tìm hiểu.
Đó là lúc dì nghĩ tới về mảng nhân sự việc làm khi nhận thấy chưa có nhiều group kiếm việc làm cho mọi người mà hoạt động theo kiểu dì muốn. Nhưng lúc đó dì vẫn chưa làm ngay, có điều gì đấy cứ giữ chân dì lại khiến dì chẳng muốn triển khai cái gì cả. Và rồi dì tiếp tục những hoạt động thường ngày trên page và sự chán nản của dì ngày càng cao lên.
Tháng 10/2018, page dì bị hack. Đó là một cú tát vào mặt dì. Thành thật với các cháu, đấy chính là cú tát cảnh tỉnh mà dì cần bấy lâu nay.
Vì sao ư? Vì lúc đấy dì mới nhận ra fanpage facebook nó mong manh tới như thế nào. Mặc kệ cho page của dì có bao nhiêu like, hoạt động bao lâu, chỉ cần nó mất một cái, và cũng chỉ cần một thời gian thôi, mọi người sẽ quên hẳn cái page này và dì tồn tại. Dì không muốn tất cả những gì mọi người chỉ nhớ là “Page Bà Dì cuối cùng cũng chỉ suốt ngày quảng cáo.” Không, dì muốn sau này lỡ page có bị gì thì ít nhất dì đã làm được những điều có ích nào đó, dù chỉ một chút thôi cũng được.
Có lẽ dì cũng được ông trời thương và cũng nhờ một người bạn tốt mà dì lấy lại được page. Dì nghỉ ngơi một thời gian để thật sự định hướng lại về cách hoạt động cũng như số phận của page. Dì sẽ thẳng thắn luôn, đúng là khi mở lại page dì vẫn nhận quảng cáo nhưng đó là để tích góp lại thêm một chút lông cánh để cho page chuẩn bị kĩ càng cho tương lai sau này. Cũng trong thời gian đấy dì bắt đầu triển khai group việc làm của dì, vì dì không muốn lãng phí bất kì thời gian nào nữa.
(link group việc làm của dì: https://www.facebook.com/groups/UnemploymentTherapy/
Linkedin của dì: https://www.linkedin.com/.../b%C3%A0-d%C3%AC-nulo-nhung.../)
Vào ngày 30/5/2019, dì quyết định thông báo cắt quảng cáo. Sau một thời gian, dì nghĩ đó là quyết định đúng đắn nhất trước giờ của mình. Dì cảm giác như vừa bỏ khỏi vai mình một tảng đá nặng vậy, khi dì không còn phải quan tâm tới sự hài lòng của các bên quảng cáo và lo lắng về phản ứng của member trong page. Không phải canh cánh nghĩ content, schedule bài, rồi phải lo canh xem có cmt nào làm đối tác pùn, v.v… Và nhất là, không còn cảm giác mình đang lợi dụng lòng tin của member khi giới thiệu sản phẩm cũng như có thêm thời gian cho cuộc sống cá nhân của mình. Dù trước đó dì từng từ chối một vài bên vì nội dung của họ không hợp với page, nhưng hiện giờ dì được thoải mái hơn về việc chọn những bên mình thật sự muốn hợp tác mà không bị nhiều trách nhiệm đè giữa hai bên. Dì cảm thấy được tự do và cảm giác page chính là của mình chứ không còn phải phụ thuộc vào ai nữa.
GIVE BACK LÀ GÌ?
Để page đạt được ngày hôm nay cũng nhờ phần lớn do chính các cháu và các member của page. Tuy đây không phải là page có lượng like lớn nhất, nhưng nó vẫn có một phần phủ sóng khá rộng với nhiều người. Nếu các cháu để ý, trong thời gian gần đây có một số post dì hỏi thăm về các startup ở Việt Nam cũng như làm khá nhiều về topic công việc. Ngạc nhiên thay, có rất nhiều cháu trong page đã hoặc đang startup hoặc đang kinh doanh, làm việc ở mảng nào đó. Page của dì bắt đầu hoạt động vào năm 2017, tính đến nay cũng hẳn có nhiều cháu đang bắt đầu hành trang vào đời. Có từng là học sinh cấp 3 thì giờ cũng đã vào đại học, có từng là sinh viên đại học thì giờ cũng đã đi làm ở công ty nào đó. Dì còn đang giữ một cái inbox của một bạn hồi còn hỏi dì thích idol nào cho tới lúc hỏi dì có muốn hợp tác công việc không nữa đấy.
Thế nên để cùng các cháu bước tiếp qua trang mới của đời, dì bỏ việc bán quảng cáo mà thay vào đó là Hỗ Trợ Truyền Thông.
“Hỗ trợ truyền thông” hiểu đơn giản là nếu có ai liên hệ với dì với mong muốn sản phẩm của mình được nhiều người biết đến hơn, dì sẽ yêu cầu họ gửi các tài liệu, thông tin liên quan đến sản phẩm đó. Nếu dì nhận thấy sản phẩm đó thực sự tốt và có chất lượng (và đáp ứng các điều kiện riêng khác), dì sẽ hỗ trợ truyền thông cho sản phẩm đó. Dì sẽ không nhận tiền, nhưng có thể sẽ yêu cầu một số benefit, tùy vào điều kiện và khả năng của đôi bên vì dì sẽ dùng uy tín của mình để đảm bảo chất lượng của sản phẩm đấy. Công việc này sẽ mang tính chất lâu dài. Nghe qua thì có vẻ không nhẹ nhàng với đôi bên lắm nhưng đây là điều dì muốn làm để hỗ trợ các doanh nghiệp, đặc biệt là các startup, để phổ biến những sản phẩm chất lượng của mọi người đến với cộng đồng. Ở đây dì sẽ gọi những bạn đang có kinh doanh riêng là “quý doanh nghiệp” nhé.
Tạm thời có hai cách để dì hỗ trợ truyền thông:
1. Đối với các mặt hàng tiêu dùng nhanh (như ăn uống, quần áo, phim ảnh,…) muốn được dì hỗ trợ truyền thông, doanh nghiệp có thể để dì dùng thử sản phẩm của mình. Sau đó, dì sẽ viết review chân thật và không chỉnh sửa theo ý của doanh nghiệp (trừ khi là fact). Tất nhiên, trước khi đăng bài, dì sẽ hỏi lại doanh nghiệp có muốn đăng review này không, nếu quý doanh nghiệp không muốn đăng thì dì sẽ không đăng.
Tuy nhiên dù review hoặc phần cmt phản hồi có phê bình nhiều hơn là khen thì mong quý doanh nghiệp đừng để điều đấy làm chùn bước, hãy chọn những ý có mang tính đóng góp để cải thiện sản phẩm của mình. Thậm chí dù sau khi đã hỗ trợ truyền thông một lần, thi thoảng dì sẽ inbox hỏi để kiểm tra tình hình đấy.
Vì dì chủ yếu ở TP HCM nên ưu tiên các doanh nghiệp ở đây trước nhé.
2. Đối với các startup, để được dì hỗ trợ truyền thông thì quý doanh nghiệp gửi email cho dì bao gồm: kế hoạch truyền thông, giới thiệu về doanh nghiệp, định hướng và nhiệm vụ của doanh nghiệp. Có thể dì sẽ yêu cầu thêm các thông tin khác để làm rõ hơn, và trao đổi với nhau để cùng nghĩ ra cách truyền thông tốt nhất.
Dì sẽ không yêu cầu bất kỳ một khoản tiền nào.
Lí do dì đưa ra quyết định đấy là để cho tất cả các doanh nghiệp dù lớn hay nhỏ đều được công bằng và có cơ hội như nhau. Tất cả sẽ dựa vào chất lượng và độ yêu thích của dì. Không còn chuyện dì phải từ chối bên này chỉ vì họ không có khả năng tài chính như bên khác. Không còn cảm giác áp lực vì tiền bạc. Nếu sản phẩm đấy xứng đáng để được biết tới rộng hơn thì dì sẽ hỗ trợ cho sản phẩm đấy.
Và cái yêu cầu lớn nhất mà dì muốn, là dì mong những doanh nghiệp lớn hay bé nếu đã tin tưởng và lựa chọn dì hỗ trợ truyền thông rồi thì sẽ làm tốt hết sức có thể của mình.
Đây là bước đi thứ 2 trong hoạt động mới của dì, group việc làm là bước đầu tiên.
Thế thì, nếu có cháu nào tự hỏi làm sao để ủng hộ cho dì, thì các cháu có thể làm những điều sau:
- Ủng hộ những sản phẩm trong tương lai tới của dì vì dì có nhiều dự án trong tương lai lắm.
- Ủng hộ những business nhất là của chính các cháu của dì mà sau này được hỗ trợ trên page.
- Ủng hộ những sản phẩm hoặc page/group hiện tại của dì.
Cái page này và các cháu đã hỗ trợ dì rất nhiều trong thời gian gần qua. Bây giờ thì page này không còn nuôi dì nữa, mà dì sẽ nuôi lại nó và tri ân lại cho mọi người.
Thật ra bây giờ có hỏi dì 5 năm tới dì sẽ làm gì với page thì dì vẫn chưa biết đâu. Nhưng dì biết sẽ làm gì trong 3 năm tới, và tạm thời thế là ổn.
__________
Email của dì là: badinulo@gmail.com, (xin miễn phản hồi booking agency xợ lắm xợ lắm)
tiêu đề email nhớ có tên công ty để dì tìm cho dễ nhé.
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ENGLISH VERSION
On May 30, I announced a cut of advertisement placement on the page. That decision was well supported by some of you but there were some who questioned why I made that decision, so in this post I will explain to you part of the reason for my choice.
Although I did not depend too much, I can not deny that the advertising money collected from this page was not a small source of revenue, and as common sense, “the page when there is a certain number of followers, the placement of advertising is a very common thing. Moreover, in order to attract advertising businesses to the page, we must have high-interactive content for them to pour more to us”. This put me on a race for a long time.
By September 2018, I suddenly got bored with my page. During that time, all I did was post some funny and innocuous posts, luckily suddenly the post got a lot of interaction, then immediately someone contacted me to place the ad and just edited a few caption, then post and receive money. I ask myself, is this what I will do forever? Then 5 years from now, what will this page look like? After the 5-year question popped up in my head, I was startled, to realize that I had absolutely no idea what to do with the page in the next 2 years, let alone 5 years. I have witnessed the fate of a number of large pages quickly flashed up in a short time and then faded into pages that were known to post links to an article. "So Nhung, do you want your page to become the same?" The answer is of course not. And so, during that time, my only choice was when I was really frustrated and I would stop working altogether. Or, I think of something new to do and find out.
It was at that time that I thought about the human resources field when I realized that there were not many groups looking for jobs for people that operated the way I wanted. But at that time, I still didn't do it right away. And then I continued my daily activities on the page and my tiredness got worse.
In October 2018, this page was hacked. It was a slap in the face to me.To be honest with you, it was a wake-up slap that I needed all this time.
Why is that? Because at that time, I realized how fragile Facebook fanpage is. No matter how many likes I have on my page, how long it works, if it takes only one, and it only takes a while, people will forget this page and my identity exists. I don't want all that people can remember is, "Nulo Auntie” page finally ends up advertising the whole day.
No, I want to see if anything bad happened with the page in the future. I can at least do some useful things, even if it just a little.
Perhaps I was lucky enough, and also thanks to a dearest friend that she got the page back. I rested for a while to really reorient the way it works and the fate of the page. I will be totally honest, it's true that when I reopened the page, I still received the ad, but it was to accumulate a little more feathers to make the page carefully prepared for the future. At the same time, I started deploying my employment group, because I didn't want to waste any more time.
(The group names Unemployment therapy:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/UnemploymentTherapy/
Group for sharing shopping deals, offers, events and mini reviews
https://www.facebook.com/groups/NhungLorenMagazine/
And you can also check my linkedin:
https://www.linkedin.com/.../b%C3%A0-d%C3%AC-nulo-nhung.../
On May 30, 2019, I decided to announce the cut of advertisement. After a while, I think that was the best decision I ever made. I feel like I have just dropped a heavy stone from my shoulder, when I no longer have to care about the satisfaction of the advertisers and the reaction of the member in the page. Not having to think about content, schedule posts, then have to worry about any cmt partner, etc. time for your personal life. Although I had previously refused a few parties because their content did not fit the page, I am now more comfortable choosing the ones I really want to work with without much responsibility between the two parties. I feel free and feel that the page is my own, no longer dependent on anyone else. A win-win situation is from now on, set up.
WHAT IS GIVE BACK?
The page stands today is also largely thanks to support of viewers, and fans.. Although this is not the page with the largest number of likes, it still has a fairly wide coverage for many people. If you notice, in recent times there have been a number of posts I asked about startups in Vietnam as well as a lot of work topics. Surprisingly, there are a lot of viewers and fans on the page who are either starting a business or doing business in a certain area. My page started operating in 2017, so far there must be many viewers who are starting to step onto working life. I know there was a high school student took first steps in uni life, and now has been working for a company( I was still keeping an inbox of a viewer asked me about my fav idols, till she dropped me a professional message for work collaborating enquiry :)).
So in order to continue with viewers through the new page of their lives, I left placing advertisement and replaced it with new activity “Media Support”.
"Media support" simply means that if someone contacted me with the desire to make their products more popular, I will ask them to send documents and information related to that product. If I finds that the product is really good and has good quality (and meets other specific conditions), she will support the product's marketing aspect.
I will not accept money, but may require some benefits, depending on the conditions and capabilities of both parties because I will use my reputation to ensure the quality of the product. This work will be of a long-term nature. It may not sound like a lot, but this is what I want to do to support businesses, especially startups, to spread the quality products of people to the community. From here I will call those of you who have your own business “BO- Business Owner”.
There are temporarily two ways for me to provide media support to BO:
1. For fast-moving consumer entertaining goods (such as food, clothing, cosmetics, movies, etc.) who wants the media support, BO can let me try their products. After that, I will write a honest review and do not make any corrections at the discretion of the business (unless it is a fact). Of course, before posting, I will ask if the BO wants to post this review, if you do not want to post, I will not post.
However, whether my review or the comment section has more criticism than praise, please, BO, do not let that falter, choose ideas that contribute to improve your products. Even though after I have finished media support, sometimes I will inbox to check on your situation.
2. For startups, to get me for media support, you should mail me, including: media plan, introduction about the business, orientation and mission of the business. Maybe I will ask for more information to clarify, and we will discuss with each other to think of the best way to communicate to viewers.
I do not require money.
The reason why I made that decision was for all businesses, big or small, would be fair and equal. It all depends on the quality and my preference. There is no longer, a reason I have to cancel this one because others are stronger in financial power. No more feeling the pressure of money. If the product deserves to be known more widely, I will support it.
And the biggest requirement that I want, is that I hope big or small businesses, if I have trusted and selected the media support aunt, will do your best.
This is the second step in my new activity, the job group is the first step.
Then, if any of you wonder how to support me, you can do the following:
- Support my future products because I have many future projects.
- Support for the business especially of viewer’s business which will later be supported on the page.
- Support my current products or page / group.
This page and viewers have supported me a lot recently. Now the page is no longer raising me, I will raise it and share it to everyone.
Actually, if I am asked what I will do in the next 5 years, she still doesn't know. But I know what to do in the next 3 years, and that's okay for the time being.
__________
My email is: badinulo@gmail.com, the subject of the email is the company name so I can easily find it.
Nhung Loren (pronounced Ñung Loren)
同時也有2部Youtube影片,追蹤數超過16萬的網紅林子安 AnViolin,也在其Youtube影片中提到,■ 更多林子安: INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/an__official/ FACEBOOK:https://www.facebook.com/Anviolin/ WEIBO:http://weibo.com/u/6511795600 Spotify:htt...
「should you have any question please let me know.」的推薦目錄:
- 關於should you have any question please let me know. 在 Bà Dì Nulo Facebook 的最佳解答
- 關於should you have any question please let me know. 在 Positiff English 職場英語教室 Facebook 的最佳解答
- 關於should you have any question please let me know. 在 Daphne Iking Facebook 的最佳解答
- 關於should you have any question please let me know. 在 林子安 AnViolin Youtube 的最佳貼文
- 關於should you have any question please let me know. 在 Jackie Toong Youtube 的精選貼文
should you have any question please let me know. 在 Positiff English 職場英語教室 Facebook 的最佳解答
What's your problem?
Any question? Any query?
「你有什麼毛病?」
「搞乜鬼 ?」
很不禮貌的說法
開完會 匯報完畢
要問大家有什麼問題
簡單直接
"Any questions?"
記得 any後要係配眾數的名詞
所以question一定要加 -s 或query 要加 -es 變queries
Remember that "any" is usually + plural noun (if it is countable)
So this structure must always be:
"If you have any QUERIES/QUESTIONS, please feel free to contact me."
其他常用說法
Please let me know if you have any questions/concerns [about the matter]
Should you have any questions/further queries, please do not hesitate to contact/email/contact me.
I am happy to answer any questions.
Got questions? Just give me a call.
Any questions? Just ask.
I welcome your questions/feedback.
Let me know your thoughts on this.
Tip:
We are want to be concise and clear. But sometimes, we gotta add courteous words–please, thanks, happy to, welcome–to communicate the positive tone.
.
.
.
.
#開會 #辦公室 #扮工 #會議 #你老闆#正能量 #香港
#成功 #英語
#演講訓練 #口才訓練
#成長記録 #求職 #提問技巧
#英語學習 #spokenenglish #Englishspeaking #englishteacher #Englishtips #英語 #takeaction
#停課不停學 #香港學生
#positivevibes #meetings #hkjobs #職業 #職人 #職場 #溝通 #打工
should you have any question please let me know. 在 Daphne Iking Facebook 的最佳解答
My sister, Michelle-Ann Iking's 3% chance of conceiving naturally was a success! Here's her story:
(My apologies as I've been overwhelmed with personal matters. I've only managed to get to my desk. So finally got around posting this).
This is the story behind my sister's pregnancy struggle and how she shared her journey over her Facebook page.
Because some may have not caught her LIVE session chat with me (https://www.facebook.com/daphneiking/videos/687743128744960/) , or read her lengthy post (as it's a private page);
she's allowed me to copy and paste it over my wall, in case you need to know more about her thought process on how AND why she focused on the 3% success probability. Read on.
-------------------------------------------
Posted 10th May 2020.
FB Credit: Michelle-Ann Iking
A week ago today I celebrated becoming a mother to our second, long awaited child.
Please forgive this mother's LONG (self-indulgent) post, journalling what this significant milestone has meant for her personally, for her own fallible memory's sake as well as maybe to share one day with her son.
If all you were wondering was whether I had delivered and if mum and bub are OK, please be assured the whole KkLM family are thriving tremendously, and continue scrolling right along your Newsfeed 😁.
OUR 3% MIRACLE
All babies are miracles... and none more so than our precious Kiaen Aaryan (pronounced KEY-n AR-yen), whose name derives from Sanskrit origins meaning:
Grace of God
Spiritual
Kind
Benevolent
...words espousing the gratitude Kishore and I feel for Kiaen's arrival as our "3% miracle".
He was conceived, naturally, after 3 years of Kishore and I hoping, praying and 'endeavoring'... and only couples for whom the objective switches from pure recreation to (elusive) procreation will understand how this is less fun than it sounds ...
3 years during which time we had consensus from 3 different doctors that we, particularly I (with my advancing age etc etc) had only a 3% chance of natural conception and that our best hope for a sibling for our firstborn, Lara Anoushka, was via IVF.
Lara herself was an 'intervention baby', being one of the 20% of babies successfully conceived through the less intrusive IUI process, after a year and a half of trying naturally and already being told then my age was a debilitating factor.
We had tried another round of IUI for her sibling in 2017 when Lara was a year old. And that time we fell into the ranks of the 80% of would-be parents for whom it would be an exercise in futility... who would go home, comfort each other as best they could, while individually masking their own personal disappointment... hoping for the best, 'the next time around'...
So the improbability ratio of 97% against natural conception of our second baby, as concurred by the combined opinion of 3 medical professionals, was a very real, very daunting figure for us to have to mentally deal with.
Deep, DEEP, down in my heart however, though I had many a day of doubt... I kept a core kernel of faith that somehow, I would again experience the privilege of pregnancy, and again, have a chance at childbirth.
And so, the optimist in me would tell myself, "Well, there have to be people who fall in the 3% bucket... why shouldn't WE be part of the 3%?"
Those who know me well, understand my belief in the Law of Attraction, the philosophy of focusing your mind only on what you want to attract, not on what you don't want, and so even as Kishore and I prepared to go into significant personal debt to attempt IVF in the 2nd half of 2019, I marshalled a last ditch effort to hone in on that 3% chance of natural conception... through research coming across fertility supplements that I ordered from the US and sent to a friend in Singapore to redirect to me because the supplier would not deliver to Malaysia.
I made us as a couple take the supplements in the 3 month 'priming period' in the lead up to the IVF procedure - preconditioning our bodies for optimum results, if you will.
At the same time, I had invested in a sophisticated fertility monitor, with probes and digital sensors for daily tracking of saliva and other unmentionable fluid samples, designed to pinpoint with chemical accuracy my state of fertility on any given day.
(UPDATE: For those interested - I obtained the supplements and Ovacue Fertility Monitor from https://www.fairhavenhealth.com/. Though I had my supplies delivered to a friend in Singapore, and redirected to me here since the US site does not deliver to Malaysia, there are local distributors for these products, you will just have to research the trustworthiness of the vendors yourself...)
I had set an intention - in the 3 months of pre-IVF priming, I would consume what seemed like a pharmacy's worth of supplements, and track fertility religiously... in hopes that somehow, within the 3 month priming period, we would conceive naturally and potentially save ourselves a down payment on a new property... and this was just a projection on financial costs of IVF, not even considering the physical, emotional and mental toll it involves, with no guarantee of a baby at the end of it all...
It was a continuation of an intention embedded even with my first pregnancy, where all the big ticket baby items were consciously purchased for use by a future sibling, in gender neutral colours, in hopes that sibling would be a brother "for a balanced pair", though of course any healthy child would be a welcome blessing.
It was a very conscious determination to always skew my thoughts in service of what the end objective was. For example, when 3+year old Lara would innocently express impatience at not yet having a sibling, at one point suggesting that since we were "taking too long to give her a baby brother/sister", perhaps we should just "go buy a baby from a shop", instead of getting defensive or berating the baby that she herself was, we enlisted Lara's help to pray for her sibling... so in any place of worship, or sacred ground of any kind that we passed thereon, Lara would stop, close her eyes, bow her small head and place her tiny hands together in prayer, reciting earnestly, "Please God, please give me a baby brother or baby sister."
After months and months of watching Lara do this, in the constancy of her childlike chant, Kishore started feeling the pressure of possibly disappointing Lara if her prayer was not answered. Whereas for me, Lara's recitation of her simple wish became like a strengthening mantra, our collective intention imbued with greater power with each repetition, and the goal of a sibling kept very much in the forefront of our minds (hence our calling Lara our 'project manager' in this endeavour).
And somehow in the 2nd month of that 3 month period, a positive + sign appeared on one of the home pregnancy tests I had grown accustomed to taking - my version of the lottery tickets others keep buying in hopes of hitting the jackpot, with all the cyclical anticipation and more often than not, disappointment, that entails...
This time however I was not disappointed.
With God's Grace, (hence 'Kiaen', a variation of 'Kiaan' which means 'Grace of God'), my focus on our joining the ranks of the 3% had materialised.
It seems poetic then, that Kiaen chose to make his appearance on the 3rd May, ironically the same date that his paternal great-grandfather departed this world for the next... such that in the combined words of Kishore and his father Kai Vello Suppiah,
"The 1st generation Suppiah left on 3rd May and the 4th generation Suppiah arrived on 3rd May after 41yrs...
One leaves, another comes, the legacy lives on..."
***
KIAEN AARYAN SUPPIAH'S BIRTH STORY
On Sunday 3rd May, I was 40 weeks and 5 days pregnant.
The baby was, in my mind, very UN-fashionably late past his due date of 29th April, so as much as I had willed and 'manifested' the privilege of pregnancy, to say I was keen to be done with it all was an understatement.
In the weeks leading to up to my full term, I had experienced increasingly intense Braxton-Hicks 'practice contractions' - annoying for me for the discomfort involved, stressful for Kishore who was on tenterhooks with the false alarms, on constant alert for when we would actually need to leave home for the hospital.
Having become a Hypnobirthing student and advocate from my first pregnancy with Lara, and thus being equipped with
(1) a lack of fear about childbirth in general and
(2) a basic understanding of how all the sensations I would experience fit into the big picture of my body bringing our baby closer to us,
I was less stressed - content to wait for the baby to be "fully cooked" and come out whenever he was ready... though I wouldn't have minded at all if the cooking time ended sooner, rather than later.
With Lara, I had been somewhat 'forced' into an induced labour, even though she was not yet due, and that had resulted in a 5 DAY LABOUR, a Birth Story for another post, so I was not inclined to chemically induce labour, even though I was assured that for second time mothers, it would be 'much faster and easier'...
That morning, I had a hunch *maybe* that day was the day, because in contrast to previous weeks' sensations of tightening, pressure and even spasms that were concentrated in the front of my abdomen and occasionally shot through my sides and legs, I felt period - like cramping in my lower back which I had not felt before throughout the pregnancy.
It was about 8am in the morning then, and my 'surges' were still relatively mild ('surges' being Hypnobirthing - speak for 'contractions', designed to frame them with the more positive connotations needed to counteract common language in which childbirth is presented as something that is unequivocally painful and traumatic, instead of the miraculous, powerful and natural phenomenon it actually is).
I recall (masochistically?) entertaining the thought of opting NOT to have an epidural JUST TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE...
I figured this would be the last time I would be pregnant and so it would be my 'last chance' to experience 'drug free labour' which, apart from the health benefits for baby and mother, might be *interesting* in a way that people who are curious about what getting a tattoo and skydiving and bungee jumping are like, might find these *interesting*...even knowing there will be pain and risk involved...
Since I have tried tattoos and skydiving (unfortunately not being able to squeeze in bungee-jumping while my life was purely my own to risk at no dependents' possible detriment) a similar curiousity about a no-epidural labour was on my mind...
In the absence of other signs of the onset of labour (like 'bloody show' or my waters breaking), I wanted to wait until the surges were coming every few minutes before we actually left the house for the hospital, not wanting to be one of those couples who rushed in too early and had interminable waits for the next stage in unfamiliar, clinical surroundings and/or were made to go home in an anti-climatic manner.
I was even calm enough through my surges to have the presence of mind to wash and blowdry my hair, knowing if I did deliver soon I would not be allowed this luxury for a while.
Around 9am I asked Kishore to prep for Lara and himself to be dressed and breakfasted so we could head to hospital soon, while I sent messages to family members on both sides informing them 'today might be the day.'
My mother, who had briefly served as a midwife before going back into general nursing and then becoming a nursing tutor, prophetically stated that if what I was experiencing was true labour, "the baby would be out by noon".
The pace in which my surges grew closer together was surprisingly quicker than I expected; and while I asked Lara to "Hurry up with breakfast" with only a tad more urgency than we normally tell her to do, little Missy being prone to dilly-dallying at meals, I probably freaked Kishore out when about 930am onwards, I had to instinctively get on my hands and knees a couple of times, eyes closed, trying to practice the Hypnobirthing breathing techniques I had revised to help along the process of my body birthing our child into the world.
I recall him saying a bit frantically as I knelt at our front door, doubled over as he waited for Lara to complete something or other, "Lara hurry up! Can't you see Mama is in so much pain and you are taking your own sweet time??!!"
SIDETRACK: Just the night before, Lara and I had watched a TV show in which a woman gave birth with the usual histrionics accompanying pop culture depictions of labour.
Lara watched the scene, transfixed.
I told her, simply and matter-of-factly, "That's what Mama has to do to get baby brother out Lara, and that's what I had to do for you also."
In most of interactions with my daughter, I have sought to equip her to face life's situations with calmness, truthful common sense, and ideally a minimum of drama.
Those who know the dramatic diva that Lara can be will know that this is a work-in-progress, but her response to me that night showed me some of my 'teachings' were sinking in:
She looked at me unfazed, "But Mama," she said. "You won't cry and scream like that lady, right? You will be BRAVE and stay calm, right?"
#nopressure.
So as we prepped to leave for the hospital I did indeed attempt to be that role model of calm for her, asking her only for her help in keeping very quiet,
"Because Mama needs to focus on bringing baby brother out and she needs quiet to concentrate...".
As we left the house at 10.11am, I texted Kishore's sister Geetha to please prep to pick up Lara from the hospital, and was grateful Kishore had the foresight to ask our gynae to prepare a letter for Geetha to show any police roadblocks between my in-laws' home in Subang Jaya and the hospital in Bangsar, this all happening under the Movement Control Order (MCO).
To Lara's credit, in the journey over to the hospital, she - probably sensing the gravity of the situation, sat very quietly in her seat at the back, and the silence was punctuated only by my occasional deep intakes of breath and some variation of my Ohmmm-like moans when the sensations were at their height.
By the time we got to Pantai Hospital at around 10.30am, my surges were strong enough I requested a wheelchair to assist me in getting to the labour ward, as I did not trust my own legs to support me... and Kishore would have to wait until Geetha had arrived to take Lara back to my in-laws' house before he himself could go up.
I slumped in the wheelchair and was wheeled up to the labour room with my eyes closed the whole time, trying to handle my surges.
I didn't even look up to see the attendant who pushed me... but did make the effort to thank him sincerely when he handed me over, with what seemed like a palpable sense of relief on his part, to the labour ward nurses.
The nurse attending me at Pantai was calm, steady and efficient. I answered some questions and changed into my labour gown while waiting for Kishore to come up, all the while managing the increasingly intense surges with my rusty Hypnobirthing breathing techniques.
By the time Kishore joined me at around 11am (I know these timings based on the timestamps of the 'WhatsApp live feed' of messages Kishore sent to his family), I was asking the nurse on duty, "How soon can I get an epidural??" thinking what crazy woman thought she could do this without drugs???!!!
The nurse checked my cervix dilation, I saw her bloodied glove indicating my mucous plug had dislodged, and she told me, "Well you are already at 7cm (which, for the uninitiated, is 70% of the way to the 10cm dilation needed for birthing), you are really doing well, if you made it this far without any drugs, if can you try and manage without it... I suspect within 2 hours or less you will deliver your baby and since it will take about that time for the anaesthesiologist to be called, epidural to be administered and kick in... it might all be for nothing... but of course the decision is completely up to you... "
So there I was, super torn, should I risk the sensations becoming worse... or risk the epidural becoming a waste?? And of course I was trying to decide this as my labour surges were coming at me stronger and stronger...
I was in such a dilemma...because as a 'recovering approval junkie' there was also a silly element of approval-seeking involved, ("The nurse thinks I can do this without drugs... maybe I CAN do this without drugs... Yay me!") mixed with that element of curiosity I mentioned earlier ("What if I actually CAN do this without drugs... plenty of other women have done it all over the world since time immemorial.. no big deal, how bad can it be...??") so then I thought I would use the financial aspect to be the 'tiebreaker' in my decision making...
I asked the nurse how much an epidural would cost and when she replied "Around MYR1.5k", I still remember Kishore's incredulous face as I asked the question, i.e."Seriously babe, you are gonna think about money right now? If you need the epidural TAKE IT, don't worry about the money!!!"... and while we are not rich by any stretch of the imagination, thankfully RM1.5k is not a quantum that made me swing towards a decision to "better save the money"...
So in the end, I guess my curiosity won out, and I turned down the epidural "just to see what it would be like and if I had it in me" (in addition of course to avoiding the side effects of any drugs introduced into my and the baby's body).
My labour occuring in the time of coronavirus, it was protocol for me to have a COVID19 test done, so the medical staff could apply the necessary precautions. I had heard from a friend Sharon Ruba that the test procedure was uncomfortable, so when the nurse came with the test kit as I was starting another surge, I asked, "Please can I just finish this surge before I do the test?" as I really didn't think I could multitask tackling multiple uncomfortable sensations in one go.
The COVID19 test involved what felt like a looong, skinny cotton bud being inserted into one nostril... I definitely felt more than a tickle as it went in and up, being told to take deep breaths by the nurse. Then she asked me to "Try to swallow" and I felt it go into my nasal cavities where I didn't think anything could go any further, but was proven wrong when she asked me to swallow again and the swab was probed even deeper. Then she warned me there would be some slight discomfort as she prepared to collect a sample... but at that point all I could think about was:
(i) I really don't have much of a choice
(ii) please let this be over before my next surge kicks in
(iii) if all the people breaking the MCO rules knew what it feels like to do this test maybe they won't put themselves at risk of the need to perform one...
In full disclosure as I was transferred into the actual delivery room at some point after 11am, another nurse offered me 'laughing gas' to ostensibly take some of the edge off... I took the self-operated breathing nozzle passed to me but don't recall it making any difference to my sensations..so didn't use it much as it seemed pretty pointless.
I recall some measure of relief when I heard my gynae Dr. Paul entering the room, greeting Kishore and me, and telling us it was going well and it wouldn't be long now and he would see us again shortly.
From my previous labour with Lara I knew the midwives pretty much take you 90% of the way through the labour and when the Dr is called in you are really at the home stretch, so was very relieved to hear his voice though knowing he would leave and come back later meant it wasn't quite over yet.
I do remember realising when I had crossed the Thinning and Opening Phase of labour to the Birthing Phase, by the change in sensations... it is still amazing to me that as the Hypnobirthing book mentioned, having this knowledge I was instinctively able to switch breathing techniques for the next stage of labour .
Was my opting against epidural the right choice for me?
Overall? Yes.
Don't get me wrong.
I *almost* regretted the decision several times during active labour... especially when I felt my body being taken over by an overwhelming compulsion to push that did not seem conscious and was accompanied by involuntary gutteral moans where I literally just thought to myself, "I surrender, God do with me what you will..." (super dramatic I know but VERY real at the time...).
I think I experienced 3-4 such natural explusive reflexes (?), rhythmically pushing the baby down the birth path, one of which was accompanied by what felt like a swoosh of water coming out of a hose with a diameter the size of a golf ball... this was when I realised my water had finally broken...
The nurses kept instructing me to do different things, to keep breathing, to move to my side, then to move to the middle, to raise my feet... and when I didn't comply, Kishore (who was with me throughout both my labours) tried to help them by repeating the instructions prefaced with "Sayang..." but I basically ignored all the intructions because I felt I had no capacity to direct any part of my body to do anything and someone else would have to physically manoeuvre that body part themselves.
When I heard Dr. Paul's voice again and the flurry of commotion surrounding his presence, I knew the time was close... and when I heard the nurse say to Kishore, "Sir, these are your gloves, for when you cut the baby's cord", it was music to my ears...
I'm very, VERY grateful Kiaen slid out after maybe the 4th of those involuntary pushes... the wave of RELIEF when he came out so quickly... it still boggles my mind that my mother was essentially right and as his birth time was 12.02pm, it was *only* about 1.5 hours between our arrival at the hospital and his arrival into the world.
Kiaen was placed on my chest for skin to skin bonding and remained there for a considerable time.
For our short stay in the hospital he would be with us in my maternity ward number C327... another trivially serendipitous sign for me because he was born on the 3rd (May) and our wedding anniversary is 27th (July).
I was discharged the following day 4th May at about 5.30pm, after I got an all clear on COVID19 and a paediatric surgeon did a small procedure on Kiaen to address a tongue-tie that would affect his breastfeeding latch... making the entire duration of our stay about 31 hours.
I have taken the time and effort to record all this down so that whenever life's challenges threaten to get me down I can remind myself, "Ignore the 97% failure probability, focus on the 3% success probability".
Also that the human condition is miraculous and it is such a privilege to experience it.
To our son Kiaen Aaryan, thank you for coming into our lives and choosing us as your parents.
Even though Papa and I are both zombies trying to settle into a night time feeding routine with you, I look forward to spending not only all future Mother's Days, but every day, with you and your Akka...
And last but not least, to my husband Kishore...without whom none of this would be possible - we did it sayang, I love you ❤️
Photo credit: Stayhome session with Samantha Yong Photography (http://samanthayong.com/)
should you have any question please let me know. 在 林子安 AnViolin Youtube 的最佳貼文
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🎶樂譜連結 Sheet Music🎶
https://gumroad.com/l/jZnTK
(台灣請用蝦皮)https://shopee.tw/product/260436562/7288780769?smtt=0.260438387-1620892392.9
--
周興哲《如果能幸福》(HBO Asia原創影集「戒指流浪記」片尾曲)小提琴版本
| Violin cover by Lin Tzu An of《Fortunate (HBO Asia Original Series "Adventure of the Ring" Theme Song)》by Eric Chou
人生是無數的選擇堆砌而成,我們做出選擇之後,都有個「如果」。
「如果」能更勇敢一點?又或是「如果」我不放棄?
所有的抉擇也都讓我們帶著這些遺憾,走向往後的人生。
我們承擔的遺憾都是活過的痕跡,這些痕跡不是為了提醒我們一直沈溺在過去,而是我們可以比自己以為的更好。當時的全心全意沒有浪費,因為僅有的一次,給了唯一的人給了當初的決定。如果是真的,必定值得;如果不是真的,也不代表決定錯了。
這些過去帶來必須承擔的遺憾,都是為了最後的那個決定做準備,所以即使站在各種人生的十字路口,也勇敢坦然不遺憾地做自己想做的,走往自己想要的方向吧:想哭的時候哭、想愛的時候就抱緊身邊的人或是直接說出口、想念已經不在身邊的人的話就寫下來對方會看到會知道的。
信義區香堤大道街頭演出變成登記制了,想聽我live版演出相關資訊,請追蹤Instagram限時動態!
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Our life is about lots of choices. After we make a choice, we all have a condition, a what if. What if I could be more brave or what if I could be patient waiting for you.
These are all our own stories and the sorties are bringing us to the present, telling us we may be better than we supposed to be, instead of being stuck in the past.
It’s not waste of time loving you for I did love you with all my heart and I want to believe you loved me too even for a split second.
If I were to choose again, I would still connect with you, love you again and stuck with you asking if you can develop a vaccine against missing you just because you were the only holic I have. The world with you in it is vague, the only one truth would be I told you I love you at the moment, looking at you with the light in my eyes for you are everything I've been looking for and I'll wait for you. I gave my heart to the very thing I know would break it and I'd love to do it again, without question =]
Okay it’s enough being so emotional. Another week, another cover. Let's goooo, hope y’all like this!
Should you have any request regarding cover songs, just comment below and let me know.
Also please share the video and subscribe to my channel https://bit.ly/2EsTGMQ.
Don't forget to click the 🔔 bell to be notified when my videos come out!
Visit me at Taipei Shin Kong Mitsukoshi Xinyi Plaza to enjoy more my live cover songs. Check it out details on my Instagram stories!
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編曲Arrange:林子安 Lin Tzu An
混音mix:林子安 Lin Tzu An
小提琴 Violin: 林子安 Lin Tzu An
攝影師剪接師 Photographer & Film editor: Santon.W
文字編輯 Social media editor/manager: Lily Wu
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【Cover by AnViolin】每週上傳新的小提琴cover影片,
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should you have any question please let me know. 在 Jackie Toong Youtube 的精選貼文
Grab food business slowing down. I got a question from a viewer asking does grabfood rating affect you getting orders. I don't really know the answer to that. But in my own opinions i think it won't affect too much.
I feel like the reason he or she asked that questions may be because he or she isn't getting a lot of orders. So i want to let the people that is working for grabfood right now, and isn't getting much orders recently to know that i am also going through the same things.
I even when to few facebook group to check with the members and i think most people are experiencing the same problems. So don't worry it's not just you or the apps having issues. I need to stress this is just my humble opinions.
If you like what i do. Please support me by subcribing to the channel and also share the videos with your friends. I'm trying my best to grow this channel. So it will mean a lot if you can help me out (:
If you have any opinions on what i should vlog next feel free to comment down below in the comment sections. I would love to hear your opinions (:
GrabFood Refer Code: toong993
Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/JackieToong?sub_confirmation=1
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jackietoong/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/JackieToong
Music used: https://youtu.be/LkbJ90wwbO8